“I’m Bored!”—How to Help Girls Use Boredom to Build Emotional Strength

It’s the cry we hear a lot by mid-July: “I’m bored!”
And as parents, it can be tempting to swoop in with a solution — a camp, a screen, a plan, a project.

But what if we didn’t?

What if we took a deep breath, nodded with empathy, and saw boredom not as a problem — but as an opportunity?

Here’s the truth:
In a world of constant notifications, jam-packed schedules, and always-on entertainment, our girls rarely have the chance to be still. And boredom? It’s actually a gateway to something powerful:
✨ Creativity
✨ Self-discovery
✨ Emotional regulation

When a girl is left with nothing “to do,” her brain begins to explore. She may remember the watercolors buried in her drawer, invent a game for her dog, journal her feelings, or simply daydream — a skill deeply linked to problem-solving and mental flexibility.

Why This Matters for Emotional Health

Many girls struggle to sit with discomfort — whether it’s a tough feeling, a quiet moment, or a sense of “not enough.”
But learning to tolerate boredom helps build frustration tolerance, resilience, and self-soothing — all essential parts of emotional regulation.

In other words, boredom is a chance to build the muscles of self-awareness and self-regulation.

How You Can Support This at Home

🔹 Don’t rush to fill the silence. Let her sit in the “I’m bored” moment without immediate rescue.
🔹 Validate first. “It makes sense that you’re feeling bored. Summer can be long sometimes.”
🔹 Redirect gently. Ask: “What’s something you haven’t done in a while that you usually enjoy?”
🔹 Create a ‘boredom shelf.’ Stock it with books, puzzles, craft supplies, old photos, or quiet activities she can explore on her own terms.
🔹 Model it. Let her see you sitting outside with tea, painting, journaling, or just being still. Boredom isn’t just for kids — we need the space, too.

What to Say When She Says “I’m Bored”

Try one of these simple scripts:

• “That’s a great sign — your brain is clearing space for something new to emerge.”

• “I’m curious what you’ll come up with next.”

• “Let’s give it 10 minutes and see what you discover.”

These messages reinforce that she is capable of finding her way through a quiet moment — and that you trust her to do so.

If your daughter is getting ready to start middle school, the two of you both need my Survive and Thrive in Middle School course. This self-paced course will walk you through everything from friendship changes to emotional regulation to creating a strong mom-daughter connection. It’s designed to support you as you begin this exciting new chapter together. Get it now for half off to help the two of you get ready for this new school year and help fight her back to school worries.

Want to go deeper?
You and your daughter are invited to join today's live group sessions:

•  The High School Support Group meets today at 1:00 PM EST/ 12:00 pm CST/ 10:00 am PST

•  Brave Girl Tribe (Middle School) at 7:00 PM EST/ 6:00 PM CST/ 4:00 PM PST

Whether you're brand new or just haven’t come in a while, we’d love to have you and your daughter join us. These are safe, supportive spaces where girls can show up as their true selves and be surrounded by kindness, honesty, and encouragement.

Let’s Normalize Stillness

In Brave Girl Tribe and our High School Support Group, we talk a lot about how stillness is strength. It allows us to listen in, to connect with what we really feel and want — and that is a superpower in today’s noisy world.

Let’s give our girls permission to pause. To be still. To be bored.
Because often, that’s where the real magic begins.

P.S. I’d love to hear what your daughter has discovered in a moment of boredom. You can reply to this email and share her “boredom breakthrough” — big or small!

Warmly,

Laura Hayes
Founder of The Brave Girl Project
Life Coach for Tween & Teen Girls
www.TheBraveGirlProject.com
[email protected]